I had a wet dream about my mom last night. words can't even begin to discribe how scarred I am. what. the. fuck.
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
Randomize
