its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass.
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
I'm working on a search warrant...can u pick up box of Chardonnay...I'll give u cash when u get here...
Yea... I love that ur a prosecutor and drink box wine
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
I can't wait to get home and brush the fuck outta my teeth.
Literally.
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
Randomize
