i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
I just wished the taco bell drive thru guy a happy cinco de mayo. Who says arizonians hate mexicans?
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
Did my married ex-boyfriend really tell me that he prays for me? Fucking Judas
I need to wash the frat house off of me
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
Would you be so kind as to inform your husband that my truck is forever cursed by mashed potatoes and it's his fault.
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
Randomize