At what point did I decide it would be a good idea to fill my contact case with vodka
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
Randomize
