You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why is your name written on my hand surrounded by hearts and a bartenders phone number?
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want my tombstone to read "making poor life decisions since 1993"
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
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