i had a dream last night that you and i organized a foursome. swear to god
ps i'll be in miami in early july. this text has no relation to the last one
Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
Houston, we have a squirter
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
I just walked by a dude at the gym covering himself in olive oil.
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
You did what with his pubic hair?
Randomize
