Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
You tried to get the stranger on the sea bus to give you a bite of his chicken sub by repeating over and over "im in a girl band"
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
I'm lying topless with an eye infection at the foot of my bed with a dog between my legs. With disney in the background. Its one of those 3 am moments
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
My new successful method of booty calling is sending a screencap of a map with the shortest route from their location to mine highlighted.
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
Randomize
