Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
I just woke up to people screaming "funnel" in my kitchen....
Happy St. Patrick's Day.
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
you know, this Evan Williams whiskey isn't so bad when it's watered down a bit and you're home by yourself on a Saturday listening to Snoop Dog alone in your apartment without pants or any plans for your future...
that's like... drinking popov and saying its the worlds best vodka. you gotta try some others first. THERE SHOULD BE A MISS AMERICA PAGEANT. but like, mr penis. and they can do tricks and make unintelligent remarks and wear sparkly condoms.
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
Randomize