I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
turns out a healthy dose of cleavage is the equivalent of a swig of felix felicis
foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
he met me at the airport with a welcome home sign with a grilled cheese, PBR and a blow job on it. i missed america.
Hey bro, did you ever hear from the background investigator that i was supposed to bang?
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
I'm upset for all the future generations who can't drunkenly get cheesy bread
A bitchslap is in order.
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