we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
You slow clapped the stripper last night.
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
You kept saying you we're gonna puke and wanted to steal my pants
That does not explain the remnants of a small fire in my bathtub.
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
Yeah, I probably need some combination of electric shock, massive quantities of LSD, and enough couch time time to make Woody Allen say "Enough".
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
Randomize
