We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
I wonder if the fact that I'm listening to the theme from lion king gives my neighbors the impression that im tripping faceeeee
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
Randomize
