He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
trying to imitate man vs food after 12 shots doesnt mean youll get laid
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
He was gone for 5 minutes, opened the car door and said, "Don't eat my shit." and dropped Chipotle on the passenger seat. He was gone for another 10 minutes and came back with Coldstone. That stoned.
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
Randomize
