i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
I just realized this morning that my fridge is stocked with coronas, hot dogs, and cheese dip. And I just got waxed. High-five, your best friend is on track to be all kinds of slutty fun this wkd.
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