My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
I woke up this morning with a bag of pepperonis in my bed.... and my facebook status was "pepperonis"
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
His drunk text included an attempt at quoting a Nyquil bottle in MLA format
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
Sorry, i'm on a strict diet of vodka and regret
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