Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
She was giving me a handjob while I was wearing a sombrero with a beer in one hand and a hammer in the other.
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
The couple that wants to take me home just paid the bartender $100 to pour tequila down my throat. I think I'm in some type of twilight zone where stds run rampant and the alcohol floweth
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
I woke up to him crying and pouring pixy stix in my mouth saying they would bring me back to life.
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
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