She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
My day in three words: secret purse cake
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
Thanks for not letting me choke to death on my vomit last night
Thank you for attempting to organize my DVDs in chronological and alphbetical order
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Randomize
