I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
I think you'll appreciae more than anyone that I'm renting my parking spot out for a half gallon of vodka a month.
I pulled my bra outta my purse. Covered in honey mustard. I still lack an explanation.
The bartender just legitimately thanked me for breaking the cycle of speed metal by playing mmmbop.
i don't think that has ever happened before in the history of man
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
I have just discovered the land of milk and honey. and by milk i mean vodka and by honey i mean tequila.
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
Randomize
