ha- omfg whatt the fuck is wrong w me. Alcohol+third cousins= bad decisions
i'm watching a show about a girl who died from masterbating with a carrot. A FUCKING CARROT, EMILY! YOU NEED TO BE CAREFUL!
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
Don't be too mad at the guy who broke your kitchen table. Didn't get his name, but he knew all about your gay porn career. Like DETAILS...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
I called you last night? What did I say??
That you love me forever and that I'm the greatest in the world now mohammed ali is dead...
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
Randomize