i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
She's laying here with her head in my lap stoned, eating Doritos, whining about her boyfriend, and listening to Cher. Fuck the friend zone.
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
Totally on the hot mess express last night. Mom said I was passed out on her kitchen floor. Told her I was drinking genuine tea.
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
Randomize
