I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
Just got 20% off at the liquor store. How you ask? I asked if there was an "I got divorced today" discount.
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
Remember how I made that resolution to remain celibate for 6 months? Well, I just broke that
You literally made that 4 hours ago...
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
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