ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
Flying to Orlando on the 7th is cheaper than the 8th by like three margaritas.
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies"
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
A. What the fuck are period panties? B. Don't ever wear them around me... or bears.
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
He raised his arm and dropped it in his sleep to smack himself awake. He knows his phone has an alarm clock right?
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
Randomize
