Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
I’m once again drinking at eight am on a Sunday in my tutu. This garment is literally my best purchase ever.
Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
This power is too much for most humans to handle safely. It's like having the nuclear launch codes, except it's my penis.
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
I'm sorry, I'm tired, I can't play long distance cockblock anymore. Good night don't get too pregnant.
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
So apparently my bro is going to make me fix his tattoo this trip... He sent me a pic of said tattoo. Tattoo is of a sperm, on his penis, which was in a woman's mouth... Wth
Randomize
