Omg. If Ina Garten Makes roast chicken one more time im going to strangle her with her white button down
My mom just drunkenly told me i was conceived in the back of a car, at a Bon Jovi concert.
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
Zombie crawl summary: 5 of 6 friends successfully laid. friend 6 too drunk to care and making out with a whale (not a costume)
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
Ever had one of those went so hard last night you woke up at the foot of the bed naked wondering where your phone ended up?
Randomize
