I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
So I used to make fun of texas a lot, then I got here and I found a place where I could get my tequila in a to go cup with a straw and I realized that this is the only place I ever want to be
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
Randomize
