You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
if I just puked into my own hand, but then cleaned it up quickly, quietly, and calmly, am I still a trainwreck?
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
What are the chances I get my period 2 weeks early just as welcome week starts. My uterus is conspiring with my dead catholic grandma
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
Randomize
