i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
woke up naked, spooning with wine bottle.. and my video chat was still open. fuck, not again.
I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
Just gave a blow job while wearing a shirt that says 'world's coolest mom' idk how my conscience feels...
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
Apparently karate chopping the fronts off all the paper towel and soap dispensers in the bathrooms isn't even frowned upon. Like even at the third bar when I fell flat on my back trying to jump kick the last one some guy just helped me up and high fived me. America.
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
Randomize
