Are you missing anything? I found a wedding ring in my bed this morning.....
I met the friendliest cop last night
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
I woke up at 3:30 this morning to pee. Luckily, I didn't have to travel far as I was asleep in my CLOSET on my yoga mat. Good news is I had a pillow...
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
Randomize