please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
So, right as I'm cumming, I pull out and go "PYEW PYEW" like Star Wars lasers. Best part is, I missed her completely.
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
She just texted me that she's horny, then started quoted random music, then telling me everything she regrets. I don't think there's enough tequila in the world for me to deal with her...
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
I'm standing on the corner in a banana costume and cape with frozen bananas in my utility belt reassessing my life decisions.
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
If I told the doordash driver it's national nudity day, think he'd still report me for being topless at the door?
Randomize
