Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
My grandma paid her handyman in pain killers. I now know why this is in my genes
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
I have a cat, a bottle of wine, and a Brazilian man. I need to catch you up on my life
I chugged vodka from a 15 ft snorkel. What the fuck did you do with your life today?
TONIGHT IS GOING TO BE A FUCKING BLAST. EVEN IF I HAVE TO SET OFF A BUNCH OF FIREWORKS IN YOUR KITCHEN.
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
Do you remember whose house we're in?
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Randomize
