How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
home. puking in laundry basket.
I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
I swear I'm going to walk in one day with you in a ballgag just masturbating feverishly
Well i can't stand the sound of my own crying
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
Randomize
