Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
you left a giant bottle of vodka in my room from last night. does this serve as a parting gift or hush money?
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
accidentally stumbled into a construction site at 3am on the way home. The bulldozer was locked so we had to settle for rerouting traffic with all the orange cones...
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
I was not drunk enough for that final.
Randomize
