He just turned on a sound machine. I need to get the fuck out of here.
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
you told the bartender not to open the bottle because you were gonna put it in your purse in case you get cut off later
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
I was puking for like ten minutes when I realized my parents were fucking in the shower and were afraid to come out
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
Randomize