No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
Trial is expected to last a fucking week if I get chosen.
To be fair, you are the kind of person I want to be on the jury when I inevitably end up in front of one.
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
The awkward moment your booty call shows up to the Mexican restaurant and realizes you just picked burritos over pussy
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
We left Waffle House and he took off running five miles down the road saying we were "training for the Olympics." And I mean, I couldn't leave him out there like that...
You were telling everyone in the bar that Jess gave you scurvy.
Randomize
