The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
can you take me to a tanning bed
sure, why though?
i have to go once so i can blame these herpes on the tanning bed and she won't get suspicious
you know you made some mistakes when your last two boyfriends are both obsessed with women's curling...
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
The dog destroyed my vibrator and swallowed several pieces. Vet gave us a laxative so now I’m checking lots of dog shit and having no orgasms. Plus the cute vet knows I don’t get enough dick, so that’s just great
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