I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
I will be naked everywhere
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
Hey. Make all the seamen/semen jokes you want. Not many people can say they fucked 2 different girls in two different countries in one week on a tax free bonus. Next up: Italy.
He stopped his car in the middle of ongoing traffic to ask me to marry him. Then he got pulled over. Yeah I'd say the slutty Dallas Cowboys costume was a success.
Your hotness may or may not have landed him in jail.
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
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