You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
I intend to get homeless drunk
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No matter how many miles separate us, I will always be here to get you through whiskey shots.
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
That's because I've spent the past 21 years convincing my parents the only emotions I have are sarcasm and bitterness.
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
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