Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
I went to the gynecologist and they said, "you're the most fun person we've ever had," and i thought, "that's exactly why i'm here!"
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
Oh god I think I promised some guy from high school that I'd be his fuck buddy in like 3 months
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
I can't promise that. They just put an extra shot in my margarita.
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
Randomize