Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
No I am not eating basil off your cock
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
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