my professor just told me i smelt like a brewery infront of my whole class b4 my final presentation
Im partying with a unicorn. You don't even know.
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
I would totes be making out with random people in the name of america if I was at the white house right now
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
Ugh it's 2016, why can't our bodies just shed fat on their own
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize
