Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
He asked if I wanted to blow his flute? Please call me and pretend there is a family emergency!!!
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
is it fun? or sober?
Randomize
