I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
vaguely remember the bartender stopping me outside last night so he could pull the duct tape out of my hair
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
You told her to step on the scale because you had whiskey goggles, and scales don't lie.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
Randomize