I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
Tinder in Coventry is like browsing a gallery of mugshots from Azkaban
So I come home this morning to get ready for a job interview and there is garlic seasoning all over the hardwood and a knife in the wall. What. the. fuck.
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