Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
I'm pretty sure his head is too big to fit between my legs. Worthless.
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
i knew it was time to leave when he woke me up only wearing pooh bear oven mitts and holding a plate of thank you pancakes
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
I just dropped off shoes at Mike's hotel. The chick he hooked up with last night stole his phone and shoes.
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
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