I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
20 yrs from now I just want to barge in her house and yell at her kids, "I took ur moms virginity!"
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
there is a money trail leading from my bathroom to my living room.. the trail ends with a half eaten bag of chips with a note that says "magical chipz".. who am i?
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
Randomize
