rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
Your grammar in that last text message was so awful.. My vagina wants to go crawl in a hole, and never speak to you again.
After the keg stand you collapsed, hit your head on the floor, started seizing and after 20 seconds got back up and said "hah, I remember my first beer"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
what are you getting to drink for new years?
well seeing as how i just got diagnosed with a uti, whatever we can mix with cranberry juice
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
It’s gonna be hard being interviewed by this girl without remembering the time she showed me her nipple piercings at Dylan’s party
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
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