They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
There is a strange man mowing my lawn. Best day ever.
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
You should've come out last night, I need someone to explain why the bartender tried to strangle me...
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
My high school reunion is Thursday so I need to find an outfit that says "Haha, you got fat and I got tits. Suck it, bitches."
my make-up looks really good tonight. I swear it had nothing to do with me finishing all of your strawberry vodka.
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
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