for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
Randomize
