Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
Random girl at this party just gave me a lap dance in a la-Z-boy. Night significantly improved.
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
Not to make this awkward, but if we ever have sex (perhaps drunkenly), all i'm gonna be able to think about is how sexy our kids would be.
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Randomize
