just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
She tied me up with her honor cords...
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
The sex was so good I feel like I could run a triathlon, hit big at the casino, and defeat ISIS.
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
I just ran into my psychology professor at Planned Parenthood she asked why I was there and I asked why she was there and it turns out we both had a scare.#bonding because of abortion.
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
Randomize
