At some point last night I thought pissing in a bottle was an awesome idea when I woke up a little piss was actually in the bottle a lot was on my TV remote
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
I'm currently witnessing my drunk neighbor attempting to fold laundry on his front lawn. I think he's trying to spell out HELP.
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him.
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
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