i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
two more shots til everyone in this club gets to see my cesarean scars.
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
YOU GOT KICKED OUT OF FIVE GUYS LAST NIGHT FOR THROWING PEANUTS AT THE PEOPLE WHO WORK THERE?!
correction: escorted out
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
The cop told you he couldn't let you pee. You just pulled your pants down and squared anyway and im surprised you didnt get arrested.No more drinking for you.
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
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